mary jo's travel blogue

33

2007-09-08T14:24:00.000-07:00

what is this amazing piece of fine jewelry?

okay OKAY people, I know it's been a while since I've blogged. I'm sure you're all foaming at the mouth, aching, just DYING to have more of my witticisms about roadtrips fill your web browser. Well I will not disappoint. Well, actually I will disappoint because I think the roadtrip has come to an end.

I really like Seattle! I'm going to stick around until I either fall in love with it or get sick of it, but as of right now I'm leaning towards the love side. The city is nice, there's lots of stuff to do here, and there are a myriad of wonderful outdoorsy-type activities within arm's length. I'm very sad that this trip has come to an end, but I'm so grateful that I got to take it. Here are some important life lessons I've learned along the way:

1. The volume on my car radio only goes up to 38. Isn't that a strange, arbitrary number to have as the max volume? I can't tell you how many times I struggled with the dial as I was trying to blast Thin Lizzy, to only have the radio stand staunchly at 38!

2. Eating cereal while driving 80mph on the highway will result in cereal getting stuck in weird places in your car and on your person. Those "Oh's!" are just too tempting to not eat while driving, but the honey really makes them stick where ever they get stuck.

3. Everyone loves a story about the time you got covered in bugs. Unless you're about to share a bed with them.

4. Wawa stores have the best bathrooms, the most consistently. They also do not exist on the West coast, so I'll have to find another chain store with sanitary bathrooms out here. Starbucks are no good, because the diurectic effects of coffee are always working against them.

5. Walgreen's drugstores are sellers of fine jewelry. Note the ring (pictured above) that I recently purchased there for $1.99, it's a glow in the dark skull that has glow in the dark LIP GLOSS inside. How cool is that? The next time someone wants to kiss me and there's suddenly a blackout, I'm going to be prepared. Will you?

6. Always put the rain fly up on your tent. Always, always, even if you don't think it's going to rain. And if you don't put it up, at least keep it in the tent with you, and not in a car that's parked a quarter of a mile away. Some lessons are learned the hard way. Or the hard and wet way.

7. There are some aging hippies out there who are very, very lonely. And they often will approach you if you hang out in the parks long enough. And they will never stop talking if you let them start. Same goes for guitar playing, and hugging.

8. When camping alone, you don't need a lot of equipment. Since I had never really been camping before I went on this trip, I got all this stuff that I didn't need like a backpacking stove and various tools for starting a fire and a portable shower bag and whatnot. Really, you can be very comfortable with just a tent, a sleeping bag, and a light source of some sort. And a big knife to slash any bears or aging hippies who get too close of course.

9. All of my friends' friends are so cool. Or course I wouldn't expect anything less, because all of my friends are cool! Everyone who provided me with a place to sleep or a new thing to do was such a pleasure to hang out with, and hopefully I'll find an apartment soon so I can return the favor someday.

10. Brooklyn is a very special place, and everyone should go live there at some point in their lives. And then they should leave. Just kidding. I'll miss the big BK so much! However I'm also really excited to get to know a new city.

11. Getting sappy in blog form does not translate.

Don't get your panties in a bunch, I'll write in this blog again soon. Who knows? Maybe this staying put thing won't stick.

32

2007-08-28T15:29:00.000-07:00

rialto beach... it's like the beach, only colder!

I spent the last couple of nights camping on the Olympic Peninsula, which was so lovely. I spent my first night on Rialto Beach, a great spot along the Western coastline where you can camp practically right on the beach, behind the safety of giant piles of driftwood. This is a pretty magical spot, lots of young folk and families gather here, and for good reason. The water is too cold to go for a swim without a wetsuit, but when the tide goes out there are all these tidal pools that allow you to view the ocean-life without actually going in the ocean. I saw three big fat starfish, and weird fat sea plants (that's the techinical name) that would close up when you touched them, and a bunch of snails and all sorts of neat-o stuff.
Then I spent one night camped out in the rainforest. Did you know that there's a rainforest in the Continental US? Neither did I, but it's here and it's really pretty. That's where I saw this giant slug!

The rainforest is very mossy and green and beautful, it looks like a place where fairies and gnomes live in giant tree stumps. I didn't spot any, but a hell of a lot of mosquitoes spotted me, yowsa! I thought I left those jerks in the dust in Utah, but apparently the West Coast has them too. I had to bust out my bug-spray arsenal all over again, I'm sure that the levels of DEET in my bloodstream have gone off the charts!

31

2007-08-25T10:26:00.000-07:00

i saw a pigskin in the puget sound!!! perhaps i've found the real source of the tacoma-aroma...

I don't think I have time to do a full-force blog entry right now, but just know THIS readers: I'm in Tacoma, WA. I'm having a ton of fun. I went to a minor league baseball game last night and the Marainers won, which apparently is not usually how these games turn out. I went on a boat ride at Salmon Beach the other day, which is where I saw that washed up pigskin, which was only identifiable as a pig because it's hooves were still attached. That is all.

30

2007-08-22T09:32:00.000-07:00

yes, it really is this cold in montana right now.

A man who I had chatted with earlier walked past me on a trail yesterday evening as I was admiring the view from the shore of Bowman Lake in Glacier NP. "It's a lot like Brooklyn," he jokingly mused. "Yeah," I laughed. "Jesus fucking christ," I thought to myself, "Look at how different everything in my life is compared to a mere four months ago. I'm in freaking Montana fer crissake." But then again, some things are not so different. Later I was multitasking by the campfire; writing in my journal, reading a magazine, and checking my next route on a map, when a family of deer came very close to where I was sitting. "Deer," I said as I tossed a rock at them, "I'm sorry but you're bothering me and I've got a lot of work to do." As if a nosy roommate had been haranguing me or something! Ah, the trials and tribulations of a city-turned-mountain lady.

On the city-gal tip: it seems like every place I've visited lately someone has told me "oh you came here at the wrong time or year." When I was in Moab it was very hot and everyone told me that I should have come in September. When I was in Jackson it was very cold and rainy and everyone told me that I should have come in July. People, it's not like I'm on a pleasure cruise here. I get somewhere when I get somewhere and I deal with the weather as is, like it or lump it. It's all new and enjoyable to a city-lady anyways!

Bowman Lake is about as far away as one can get from the city in America, at least it feels that way. There are two ways to get here: 40 miles down a mostly dirt, partially paved road, or 36 miles down a single lane all dirt road. I tried both ways, the all dirt road is more scenic but it's really curvy so you feel like a truck is going to plow you down from the opposite direction the whole time. Fun! On the partially paved road there are not one but two places where you can pay to take a shower, and we all know how much I enjoy bathing. Especially here in grizzly country, where it's best to keep yourself as odorless as possible.

29

2007-08-20T16:57:00.000-07:00

what awaits you in montana? a lovely bunch of nothing.

Oh so much has happened since I last blogged I don't know where to start! I'll just randomly spout some things off: I drove through Vernal, UT where they have a REALLY cool statue of a dinosaur wearing a cowboy hat and sunglasses holding a watermelon, next to a pedestal with a hamburger on it. I don't know what the hell it's about but aesthetically it's amazing. I camped in Grand Teton National Park which is very pretty and very much full of bears, but not quite as full of bears as Glacier National Park where I am now. I went to the farmer's market in Jackson Hole and obtained a ridiculously huge bunch of carrots for four dollars, which I am still eating. I didn't sleep a wink in the two days I spent in the Grand Tetons because it stormed the first night that I was there and the second night I went out on a very long date with a boy who worked in the park (local beer = yummy!) and then left early in the morning for Montana. When I got to the hostel I slept at during my first night in Glacier I went to bed at like 9:30 and slept for about 12 hours, only interrupted once in the middle of the night when I went to go use the outhouse. I was very frightened that the bears and mountain lions and wolves of Glacier would be lying in wait for me outside the outhouse, but it all turned out okay.

glacier np is pretty!

The Northfork Hostel is an old dude ranch that was converted into a hostel in 1979, it's a really neat spot just west of Glacier that you have to drive waaaaay down a dirt road to get to. The people there are exceptionally friendly, the place feels much more like the communes I've stayed at rather than a hostel. There is little in the way of modern conveniences but they do have kerosene lamps in every room and an indoor shower and a fully functioning kitchen, which is more comfort than I'm used to these days. They give you the option of sleeping either in a dorm, cabin, tipi, or your own tent. I chose the dorms since beds are few and (literally!) far between for me these days.

So I've driven through an enormous climate change in the last few days, I went from sweating in 100 degree weather in Moab to busting out my sweatshirt in Grand Teton to breaking out my zero-degree sleeping bag in Glacier! I can't believe it's August, it feels as though I must have driven into the month of November here. It's pleasantly chilly though, and a welcome change from the desert heat.

Speaking of heat, there's a lot of forest fires going on in Montana right now! I drove through some on my way up here, which appeared to be healthy, natural, under-brush burning fires, but it was still a crazy sight. There are huge encampments of fire fighters and national guardsmen all along the highways in some areas, and whole valleys enclosed in a smoky green haze. At the ranger station in Glacier NP they said that there were some fires going on in the eastern part of the park, which I am staying away from. Between the bears, cougars, wolves, and forest fires, northwestern Montana sounds pretty formidable right? Yeah probably, but the sights are spectacular enough and the locals are friendly enough that I'm pretending not to notice. I'll probably make it out alive. Probably.

28

2007-08-16T13:33:00.000-07:00

double-O arches at arches NP

Ah, another day, another hike where I feel like I'm going to die alone in the desert. Today I explored Arches National Park, where I must say the little piles of rocks trails were much better maintained than those at Canyonlands'. My apologies to the hottie ranger at Canyonlands, but your trails blow compared to Arches. Btw there's a very hot park ranger who works at Canyonlands, he hunted me down to talk to me because he saw my NY plates and he's from Buffalo. I couldn't have been happier to talk about that crappy town with him. But other than that guy, there's little reason to choose Canyonlands over Arches.

So I started off my hike this morning with a friend I met at the Lazy Lizard hostel, where I am staying and where one can procure a clean bed for a mere 9 dollars, but we parted ways after a bit because she had a skydiving appointment at 10am (ref: "extreme sports types" in the previous entry). Then I proceeded to go through a whole trail loop that was much longer than I expected (god forbid I check a map), and I ended up sweating my face off in the mid-morning sun once again. The scenery was really nice though, and the hike was pleasant before the sun was in full force.

"dark angel," a landmark that is not nearly as cool-looking as its name would imply.

Oh and to make matters worse, these parks are all inexplicably filled up with European tourists, who go hiking in chic little outfits and carry around little Evian bottles and who never sweat or pant no matter what. How do those French ladies do it? They always look cool and stylish, even in the desert in August. When I was camping in Canyonlands I saw a German family that was driving around in a huge kelly green antique chevy pick-up with a matching green trailer, how cute is that? Even their camping gear was stylin!

On a completely unrelated note: You know what the worst thing about not having a home is? There's no place to send Netflix. When I had to cancel my Netflix account it was like tearing my first born from my breast, there are few words to describe how much I love Netflix. And now they keep sending me taunting emails, that say things like "Come back to Netflix for only $4.99!" Oh Netflix gods, don't you understand that if I could I would? Man I miss my zombie movies.

27

2007-08-15T17:02:00.000-07:00

The desert is scary. The dessert is delicious! Mmmmm… dessert.

Moab is a hotspot for extreme-sports types, I could tell I was getting close on the highway when a van full of professional mountain bikers drove past me and held up a sign that said “we fuck for money.” Oh bless your hearts extreme-teamers, what would the late 1990’s have been like without you? Do the dew!

So today I thought it would be a great idea to go for an eight mile hike in Canyonlands National Park. An eight mile hike in the desert in August, sounds swell, right? Believe it or not it was a horrific idea. First of all, instead of trails like us east coasters are accustomed to (i.e. little dirt roads in the woods that are easy to spot) the trails out here are imaginary little roads that are marked by small piles of rocks. Small piles of rocks?!? I’m in “Canyonland,” fer crissake everything looks like a pile of rocks. Needless to say, I wandered off the “trail” several times which is really scary when you’re hiking by yourself. Secondly, it was just too freakin’ hot outside for me to be wading through the sand and scaling boulders today. I got a little less than three miles out and then I decided to turn back rather than risk dying of heat exhaustion on mile 8. I ran into a couple of other hikers on my way back. They were like “We saw your footprints, are you not doing the whole loop?” I thought it was weird that they had been tracking my footprints, what am I, a jackrabbit? I said “No, I’m too hot, I decided to go back.” They were like “Well do you have enough water?” And I’m like “Yes, but that doesn’t change the fact that it’s 100 DEGREEES out here!” Frankly, I’m sick of all this talk about water here. If I’m hot because I’m climbing rocks in 100 degree weather, water is not going to do a damn thing about it unless I’m bathing in a giant, icy pool of it.

But I dis the desert too harshly. What I did see of Canyonlands today was very, very pretty. I saw amazing sheer rock cliffs and crazy gnarled trees and cute little cacti and adorable little bunnies and lizards (and no rattlesnakes). Plus the quiet that exists out here is unlike anything I’ve ever heard before, I think my ears are actually ringing on account of the lack of noise. Every time I burp I feel like it echoes for miles…

26

2007-08-15T16:56:00.000-07:00

Moab, UT looks like the surface of Mars! I actually exclaimed out loud as I was driving through Canyonlands National Park “Wow, this looks different!” I’ve never been anywhere that looks like this and that makes me very happy.

On my way here from Denver I stopped at the Yampah Spa in Glenwood Springs, CO. For under 40 bucks I got a 45 minute mineral bath (we all know I needed a bath) and I could spend as much time as I could stand in their 115 degree Vapor Caves, which is like a giant all-natural steam room that smells like sulphur. It was fun to hang out in a big weird dark dripping cave with lots of half naked people walking around, it felt like a scene from a Dario Argento movie. Now it’s hours later and I still kind of smell like sulphur, but what else is new?

Speaking of my hygiene, let’s talk about personal upkeep while on the road. Yes, I was “that girl” this evening, that weird girl sitting on the bumper of her car clipping her toenails in a parking area at a National Park. Just in case any of you were wondering it is possible to maintain a beauty regimen while roadtripping, you just have to be willing to be that weirdo who’s washing her face and armpits in a rest stop bathroom. Here are some tips that I’ve made up along the way:

1. Cetaphil is a godsend: because you don’t have to use water to rinse it off! You can wash your face by just putting it on and then wiping it off with a washcloth, your t-shirt, what-ev’s. Me likey because I can camp out and be filthy and not shower for days and days but my face still looks like that of one of you normals. See the end of this blogpost for a funny story about not showering.

2. What to do if your armpits stink and you’re nowhere near a shower: This has happened to me many times, so I invented a little stanky-pit refresher. I mix a little bit of tea tree oil with a little bit of water and I splash it under my arms. Tea tree oil is antibacterial so it helps to kill the smelly germs, and it has a clean scent.

3. I figured out why the hippies love their patchouli so much: it very effectively masks the scent of body odor! Something about the woodsy smell really efficiently cancels out B.O. smell. So far scientific research has failed to come up with a reason why, but I hear that researchers are working around the clock at Princeton.

4. Aquaphor is also a godsend: especially when you’re in the desert or the mountains and your skin is drier than a zombie’s! This stuff costs like three bucks for a tube and it has a million and one uses. It works for chapped lips, it can be an under eye cream, it helps cuts heal smoothly, you can put it on dry feet, it’s awesome! When I was a kid I feel like my mom whipped out her giant tub of Aquaphor for any skin ailment I ever had, and I used to think she was bonkers for it but as is always the case Mom was right.

Okay time for the funny story about not showering. One night long ago when CBGB’s was still open a friend of mine had a photo show there. I was waiting out front to meet her and a homeless man came up and started talking to me, as they often do. He said “Do you know what it feels like to take a shower after you haven’t showered for two weeks?” I decided to take a “I’m just as crazy as you” approach so I said “Yes.” He said “No you don’t!” And I said “You know what? I haven’t showered for three weeks.” And he flipped out! He walked away, shouting stuff like “Damn, that bitch is STINKY!” I was flabbergasted, I was like “I can’t believe I just grossed out a homeless man.” Don’t worry I was lying to him, when I lived in NYC I was really into the whole showering on a regular basis thing.

25

2007-08-10T15:16:00.000-07:00

a singles network flyer that someone left on my windshield at the whole foods parking lot in denver. how flattering!

Get ready, National Parks of Northwestern America, I'm comin' at ya! In the next two weeks I'm going to be camping and hiking at all of the following parks:

- Rocky Mountain NP
- Canyonlands NP
- Arches NP
- Grand Teton NP
- Glacier NP

On the National Parks Service website , which I am a HUGE fan of, their tagline is: Experience Your America. Well I am certainly taking my America for a spin this month. I know that devoted readers of my blog (of which I'm sure there are many) will remember me bitching about the eighty dollar price tag for a National Parks Pass but I think that the outrageous cost has really propelled me into visiting as many parks as possible this year. That and the fact that I've got no house and no job and I've got to spend my time somewhere, doing something! Might as well go for a hike.

I don't think I have any highlights from Denver this week, although I did go to the local Buffalo Exchange (always a favorite clothing store of mine) and get a bitchin' new vest for twelve bucks. For those of you not in the know Buffalo Exchange is a chain of stores where you can buy and sell used clothes, it's pretty great but naturally it can't compare to my true fav Beacon's Closet in Brooklyn. To follow my stream of consciousness here's a funny story about Beacon's Closet:

Once I was on the B63 bus on 5th ave in Brooklyn and there were these two girls my age sitting in front of me, and being the snoop that I am I was eavesdropping on their conversation. The bus drove past Beacon's Closet in Park Slope. The one girl was saying how Beacon's Closet was prejudiced against "bigger girls" because she always tries to sell her clothes there but they don't take them because she's a size 10, while her friend who is a size 6 never has any problems selling clothes to them. I giggled because I'm a size 10 and I sell my clothes to Beacon's Closet all the time, I made 300 bucks there when I moved. Clearly that girl was pinning the blame on her clothing size, when really it was just that her clothes sucked. And I resent that girl calling herself "bigger" at a size 10, I think we're pretty damn normal-sized. Ain't nothing wrong with having an ample booty, lady! Now go buy some new clothes, because nobody wants yours.

Ah, Brooklyn life. I don't really miss it that much, I know it's hard to believe after that thrilling tale.

24

2007-08-06T08:48:00.000-07:00

denver is ugly, so i took a picture of my friend's doggie instead.

Yup, sorry to say this Denver, but your architecture is incredibly un-noteworthy. I drove in on I-76 and was thoroughly unimpressed by the skyline. But looks aren't everything, are they?
Yesterday my friend and I went to a party at Avery Brewing Co. in Boulder, which was pretty fun. For fifteen bucks you could have all the beer you could handle and all the roast pig you could swallow! I'm a veggie, so I stuck to the flat tooth options of coleslaw and watermelon, a delicious combo. They roasted six pigs in all, and they lined up all the heads on a table with apples in their mouths. Gross, but kind of funny! There were lots of jam bands playing and plenty of men wearing cargo shorts and flip flops playing hacky sack, not typically my kind of scene but after a couple of IPA's I could stomach it. I like people-watching, and this was a grand spot for it. We met up with another friend who is an acquaintance of the Brewer through the rock-climbing community, we sat at the Brewer's table and admired everyone's stellar biceps and good tans. I enjoy a serious athlete who appreciates a good beer or two. There was one lady there who apparently is a world famous climber, and she had the baddest biceps of them all for sure. Don't ask me her name, because even if I had learned it yesterday I sure as hell wouldn't remember it now.
Today I'm just sittin' back and enjoying the pleasure of peanut butter on wheat thins on a rainy day...

23

2007-08-06T08:33:00.000-07:00

This travbuddy thingee is kind of neat-o, it's like myspace only tailored specifically for traveling bums like me!

Where are you going? Create your own travel map!

View mary_jo's TravBuddy Profile

22

2007-08-05T11:58:00.001-07:00

I don't really feel like blogging at the moment because I'm on my way to a brewery party, but I just wanted all of you to bask in the glory that is Crazy Horse Mountain. His head is 22 stories high!

I'm in Denver now, more on that later...

21

2007-08-02T19:58:00.000-07:00

rattlesnake-o-mania!

The Badlands! Yeah man they're bad, they're real bad! Sorry, but I'm actually reading "On The Road" right now because I've never read any Kerouac and I feel like kind of a fraudulent traveling bum, so I'm trying to catch up. When I was driving through South Dakota today I saw a hand-painted billboard that said "Abortion: the choice that kills." C'mon, I don't think you can say that abortion is "the" choice that kills, there are lots of choices that kill! Murder, drug overdose, take your pick! Silly Dakotans and your anti-choice ways.

So I just made it to the Badlands today, I ended up staying in Madison for longer than expected for kind of a crazy reason. My friend who I was staying with there was hired to do a mural outside of a restaurant on short notice, so she asked me to stay and help. So she came up with a great design on very quickly and then the next day we went to go start working on it. Now mind you, this mural was not to be placed on the restaurant itself but on a building next to the restaurant in an alley that the restaurant's windows looked out on. Basically the owner didn't want his patrons to be staring at a concrete wall through the windows in his main dining hall anymore, so he hired my friend to paint a lovely picture there. So we went to work! Only after a couple hours of working on it (when it was starting to look really good, believe you me) a man who worked in the building next door came over and told us to stop painting. It turns out that the restaurant owner had neglected to get permission from the building next door to paint on their property! The good news is that I made a couple of bucks and I didn't get arrested. The bad news is that we didn't get to finish our awesome mural. C'est la vie, what a week.

Now I'm in the Badlands National Park in SD, and I'm terrified that I'm going to see a rattlesnake. I don't know why I'm so scared of them, I've never encountered one before in my life. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that about every five feet in this park there's a sign that says "caution: rattlesnakes!" with an exclamation point, I sh*t you not, and then has a picture of a rattlesnake, poised to attack! That is a little disconcerting. So now every time I climb up a boulder here I'm stomping all over the place like Frankenstein, and singing because I think that that will scare them away before I get there. I think that only works for bears though. Oh and to complicate things a yellow jacket stung my ankle the other day at the Madison Arboretum, so my lower right leg has now swelled up to five times its normal size. I've got the ankle of a 400 lb woman right now, it's great. Maybe that's why I ate so many salty snacks today, to try and bloat up the rest of my body with sodium to match my ankle. I decided that I needed an ace bandage or something today, so I tied a neon pink bandanna that I bought at a thrift store in Madison around it today, which resulted in a Punky Brewster kind of look that I'm really enjoying. Fat ankle aside, I think I've started a new trend.

20

2007-07-29T09:22:00.000-07:00

the thai pavilion at the madison arboretum, pretty!

Alright so I must admit that before I traveled through the Midwest my expectations for the area were pretty low. I didn't expect to do much more than see some fields full of cows, eat some cheese curds, and then be on my way. As usual my preconceived notions about a place I had never been were completely off base! I spent this week in Madison, WI, where I thoroughly enjoyed the people and the cheese curds.
Last night I went to a hip hop show (that's right, hip hop in Wisconsin!) and the MC was talking about how Mid-westerners are made to feel like they're inferior to the coastal cities and how they have their own culture that they're proud of, which I thought was really nice. Good for them for not just bowing down to pop culture and trying to imitate whatever's going on in NY and LA, having your own image is infinitely cooler than biting someone else's. It made me realize how snobbish I was being by thinking that I was going to encounter a bunch of rednecks out here just because I'm an east coast lady. To misquote a song title from The Gossip: lesson learned!
One thing I really like about Madison is that much like Richmond, VA it's a very bicycle-friendly city. My gracious hosts here have an extra bike (with a cup holder!) so I've been cruising around town a lot. There are bike routes here that go all over the place, some are more scenic and others just get you where you have to go.
Other highlights of my trip here include:

- The downtown farmer's market: I'm such a free sample whore, and this place was like my pimp yesterday. Endless samples of local cheese and produce, anyone? Really decent prices too which is always good for a bum like me, a buck stretches a long way here.

- The Orpheum Theater: this great old local theater with wonderful architectural detailing. A little on the crumbly side, but decay can be pretty in its own way.

- State Street: A pedestrian-only area on the University of Wisconsin campus. There are lots of nice restaurants on and around the campus and a great seating area right on the lake. My friend and I ate ice cream there and watched sailboats because she was having a bad day. Who doesn't get cheered up by ice cream and sunshine?

Okay I really want to write more about how much I like Madison but it's mid-afternoon and I'm still in my jammies and I'm going to be really embarassed if my hosts get home from work and I'm not dressed or showered.

Next I'm going to explore the Badlands in South Dakota, party party! All my friends who have been there tell me that it's an amazing place, I expect nothing less than instantaneous spiritual rapture upon arrival based on their reports. However I am scared that I'll see rattlesnakes, booooooooo.

19

2007-07-24T11:28:00.001-07:00

oh yeah... that's a cooling tower back there.

Damn Indiana, you look good! I'm sorry if this is a rash generalization but from what I had seen of the rest of small-town America I was expecting the Chesterton, IN locals to be on the chunky-i-shop-at-sam's-club side but I was dead wrong. The residents of the Indiana Dunes area are healthy and active and they look like it! I can understand why, there are loads of great outdoor activities here that the locals take advantage of. There are endless steep dunes to scramble up and down (really, it's fun) and the scenic Calumet bike trail goes all up and down the lakeshore.
Also, I was not expecting that everyone would be so nice in Indiana, but again I was wrong! The towns surrounding this National Park seem somewhat economically depressed, but that hasn't taken a toll on the morale of the residents at all. Everyone that I've encountered from the gas station to the post office has been overtly friendly. Even when I went into the Ranger's Station and acted like a total spazz (first I couldn't open the door, then I tripped into the door, then I couldn't close the door when I was leaving), the people who worked there were nice and efficient and didn't even laugh at me.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not moving here or anything. The beach at Lake Michigan is NOT like the real beach, sorry non-coastal people but it's just not, and the number of factories and refineries that are on the shore here kind of gross me out. When you're standing on the lakeshore here you've got smokestacks on either side of you, and I have to imagine that some sort of ickiness is making its way into the water. Yeah and the beach here is not like an ocean beach: there are no waves and therefore no surfing, no one really goes swimming, it's not very warm here, there's no boardwalk, it's just not the same. And by not the same I mean not as good. However, it was pretty nice this morning when I went to the main beach of the lakshore and no one else was there so I could do yoga and meditate and scramble up the dunes and stuff and not feel self-conscious. The unpopularity of the inferior beach played in my favor that way.
As far as other thoughts in my head, I've started to scold myself (silently, don't worry) when I leave my car without any ID or a cellphone or anything. I think to myself, "What will happen if something happens to your car? What will happen if something happens to you? How will anyone know who you are? You're nobody, you're just a girl with a spork in her hand." This happened about an hour ago when I went to go wash my spork. So the moral of the story is: if you read in the paper about a dead or injured girl with no means of identification save the purple spork in her hand, it's me!

18

2007-07-20T07:25:00.000-07:00

i really do heart new york.

Hooray! I came back to Brooklyn for a visit this week, and naturally had a blast. Okay I did a yoga workshop too, alright?!? Don't bother me, I know I've got a yoga problem. It started at 7am for five days in a row, which was pretty brutal. I truly despise getting on the subway before 6:30 in the morning, unless I've been out all night. But on the sunny side, you always get a seat because no one else is crazy enough to commute that early in the morning.
I visited my favorite local haunt in my old neighborhood, B61 (yes it's a bus route but it's also a bar). Nothing much has changed there. Even if it did, would it really matter after a couple of beers?
I also visited my favorite seasonal haunt in the hood, the Gowanus Yacht Club. No, it's not nearly as fancy as it sounds, it's just a fenced-in patch of concrete with a bunch of picnic tables and a grill and lots of PBR in a can. The beauty lies in its simplicity, it's a great place to hang with friends on a warm summer evening. And they've got great pickles.

Next I'm heading westward along a northern route, which I am very very very excited about! Currently I am in Indiana Dunes National Park, which is located on the shore of Lake Michigan. This is my first great lake-ing experience, I know that people who are not from a coast say that this is just like the beach but I don't buy it... yet. It's now around 11pm and I just got here so I guess I'll have to let you know later because I don't feel like going for a dip by myself in a giant lake after sundown in the middle of nowhere. Fancy that!
The drive today through Pennsylvania and Ohio was incredibly boring and ugly, definitely the most non-pretty drive so far. My apologies to those states but really, your highways leave much to be desired in the way of scenery. Indiana looks prettier but kind of smells like horses in a bad way, I'll let you know how I feel about it during daylight hours. Middle America, I haven't given up on you yet!

17

2007-07-16T10:53:00.000-07:00

a nice path to the lake at kripalu. despite the ***king mosquitoes.

Okay, last yoga ashram of the month, I promise! This weekend I did a workshop at the Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health in Lenox, MA. Alright I have to give a tip to all my single male readers out there who are looking for love (of which I'm sure there are many) who are too shy to email me for some reason: Yoga centers are the place to meet hot single girls in their 20's. Forget the bookstore as your intelligent singles hotspot, that is sooooo 2006. Every yoga place I've been to has been almost entirely populated by friendly good-looking girls. Not only are they hot, but you know that they're into yoga so they're comfortable with their bodies and they're all bendy and stuff. And they're probably smart (since they're smart enough to do yoga, like me!) and they probably have a decent enough job that affords them the luxury of visiting yoga centers. Do it, go now, the girls are waiting.
There was one cutie guy in one of the yoga classes I took at Kripalu, I called him "Vince Neil" in my head because he looked a lot like Vince Neil from Motley Crue back when Vince Neil was hot and not a fat recovering drug addict. And before he killed those two kids in a drunk-driving accident. Could I use the word hot more in this entry? Hot, hot, hottie hot hot.
Wow I forgot to talk about the yoga center. This place was definitely more of a retreat than an ashram, it cost a lot more than the other places but it was worth it for a lot of reasons. The first one being that I slept in a bed inside instead of a tent outside. The second one being that I was allowed to have caffeine there (a lot of ashrams don't like caffeine) and they even provided the tea bags for it. The third one being that they had a whirlpool and a sauna there that was sex-separated so you could go in naked. The fourth one being that the yoga asana classes were really physically challenging in a good kind of way. To sum up: me likey Kripalu!

16

2007-07-11T20:31:00.000-07:00

my friend's crappy directions to frost valley, it says "right not left or you will go into Liberty and get killed by crackheads."

Ah... another week, another yoga ashram. No this is not exclusively a blog about yoga ashrams, I promise I'm just going to one more this weekend and then I'll talk about something else. Okay maybe I'm going to a yoga workshop in new york next week but then really, that's it! I am not a yoga addict.
This week I visited the Sivananda Yoga Ranch in Woodbourne, NY. This ashram is situated on a hill that faces the Catskill Mountains, so it makes for some picturesque views while you're going through your asanas! As long as the weather permits, all the yoga classes take place on an outdoor platform which I thought was nice. I got pretty sweaty it being July and all, but everyone else was sweaty too so I didn't fret. The ranch is also equipped with a sauna, but who the hell is going to utilize a sauna when it's 93 degrees outside and there's no air conditioned buildings in sight? Not me, sister!
I was a little frightened of the food situation before I got to the Yoga Ranch, since they informed me that they not only eschew the use of meat or dairy (which is typical yogi fare) but they also ban garlic and onions for some reason. Bland-town, anyone? I thought I would be munching on raw carrot sticks the whole time but actually the meals turned out to be excellent. There were plenty of grilled zucchinis adorned with tahini-based dressing and veggie pâté and whatnot to keep me satisfied. I definitely stuffed my face at every meal time, since we only ate twice a day there and the asana classes and "walking meditation" (hikes) were pretty physically intense. I like how every time I visit a yoga ashram I write a little about the yoga and a lot about the food. I know where my priorities lie.
To sum up I'll repeat my exact words from the last entry--- Overall it was a good visit to the ashram. However I do have gentle warning about Sivananda Yoga ashrams in general: if you're not into Hindu Mysticism and chanting and all that jazz, find another yoga retreat.
Other than yoga-ing it up, I've been hanging out in White Lake and eating lots of pizza and going on lots of fun hikes. One of my new favorite hiking spots here is Frost Valley in the Catskill State Park. My friend took me to Slide Mountain, which was very pretty but also very rocky so I got too tired and couldn't make it to the top to see the hot views. We decided to go back soon for round 2: Mary vs. the Mountain. I'll get you yet, you inanimate pile of rocks!

15

2007-07-02T06:00:00.000-07:00

rock on lotus temple!

Last week I spent several days with a buddy at Yogaville, a yoga ashram located outside of Charlottesville, VA. I was very interested to check out this spot for myself since I had heard many differing opinions on it whenever I encountered someone who had visited. Some people said that it was a scary cult-y type of place where the followers worship the guru who started the place. Others said that it was a nice friendly place where they serve delicious vegan food three times a day. I know you're perched on the edge of your chair waiting to hear my opinion so here it is: although Yogaville has its qualities that may disagree with some yogis, it's a good place overall.

The bit about the yummy food was 100 percent true! For breakfast, lunch, and dinner they put out a very appealing lacto-vegetarian (mostly vegan) spread buffet-style, so you could always go back for more curried tofu. Another visitor shared with me a healthy dessert that she had invented and you all should try: yogurt mixed with peanut butter and honey and cinnamon yummmmm I'm ready to meditate now. Yogaville is also worth a visit just for the lovely scenery, they've got 600 acres of mostly undeveloped land and lots of trails in the woods to explore. If you're there at this time of year though get ready to sweat- the muggy southern Virginia air is the definitive opposite of refreshing. My friend and I were ready to cool off in their man-made swimming hole, but as soon as we reached the water's edge we saw a giant snake go in the water about 6 feet to our left. Then we ran away.

As far as the guru worship bit, I'd say "worship" is too strong of a word. The staff and practitioners at Yogaville have a great reverence for Sri Swami Satchidananda (who founded the joint) and there sure are a lot of pictures of the guy all over the place, but they don't worship him and they don't force any other visitors to do so. My only real qualm with Yogaville? Carpeted yoga studios! All their studios were covered in this thick carpeting that was really hard to balance on for standing poses and was pretty nasty to put your face on for floor poses. I know this sounds très retardé to people who don't practice but trust me it makes a difference. But other than that, I'd say I had a pretty pleasant visit to the ashram overall.

I think it's clear that I was in charge of decorating the above cake.

Now I'm back in my favorite spot to be: White Lake, NY! The boys are opening their restaurant soon (ALERT all Catskill region residents: check out the Benji & Jake's link on the left!!!) and I've got lots of hiking and wakeboarding to do. My friend baked a cake for me in honor of my return but he hadn't decorated it when I got there, so I took over in that department. What?!? I like zombies and bloody skulls and I like yoga, these are interests which can coexist people!

14

2007-06-17T20:00:00.000-07:00

omg that truck is headed right for me!

Lordy Lord there is a mosquito buzzing around in my car right now and it is driving me bonkers! At least only one got inside, I'm camping out in Assateague Island on the Maryland side of the Chesapeke Bay tonight and the mosquitos and biting black flies are fully out of control here. While I was hanging on the beach today I was spraying myself with bug spray about every 5 minutes and I still couldn't deter the black flies, my friend concluded that they were actually enraged by the bug spray and thereby prompted to attack. It's all worth it though for two little words... WILD PONIES!!! Feral horses roam this island and its neighbor Chincoteague, they've been here since the late 17th century. They are super cute and very comfortable with people hanging out on what is clearly their beach. I happened to stay here on a night where there was a lunar eclipse, which I watched with rapt enjoyment as I ate 69 cent spaghettios right out of the can (Yeah I'll probably catch botulism someday soon, but I guess some women pay good money for that stuff). During the day, I've just been chillin' with my ponies on the beach.
Next I'm heading to my folks' house to fast for a couple of days, so I'm sure me being hungry and cranky and light-headed will make for totally tubular blogging content. I wanted to do something to physically prepare for my upcoming trip to Yogaville, a yoga ashram in Charlottesville, VA. Needless to say, my eating habits have been a little irregular since I've been on the road (reference: spaghettios above). Mmmm... 2 days of lemon juice, here I come!

13

2007-06-12T14:20:00.000-07:00

richmond thug-life style

Richmond, VA is a city I have neglected to explore before this week, despite the fact that I grew up a mere two hours drive away (two hours is child's play for me at this point). That all changed on Sunday as I took Richmond by storm! I'm sticking around here for a few days on account of the fact that I have multiple friends and relatives here that I can mooch off of. That way I can go from couch to dinner table to couch without raising any suspicions from any of my hosts, heh heh heh...
The evening I arrived in Richmond I ate at Six Burner, an awesome restaurant on Main Street that dishes out many fancy foods and wine. I never would've been able to eat there if much of the staff hadn't been made up of friends of friends of mine, but if you've got the bucks or you want to impress a lady friend you should check it out. Afterwards we had drinks at local hipster bar Ipanema, which was super fun until when we tried to leave and our exit was slowed by three men in handcuffs on the sidewalk out front. They were being arrested in connection with a shooting at a nightclub down the street. I think Brooklyn follows me everywhere!
Today I explored Belle Isle, a pedestrian-only park on the James River, where I took the photo above. There are ruins of several turn of the century steel factories there which made for some neat exploring. Beer bottles evidenced the fact that lots of teenagers like to drink beer there. They also like to smash the bottles when they're finished, so don't wear flip flops when you visit this island or you're likely to get a nasty gash! Don't worry, Belle Isle has more to offer than broken glass and graffiti. The suspension bridge you walk across to get there is really cool (it made my friend a little anxious, but I liked it), and you can walk out on big rocks on the river bank and lazily sun yourself for hours on end. There are also lots of nice little shady areas around the factory ruins that would make pleasant scenery for picnicking or kissing or both. Maybe you could picnic and then kiss. But hey, no pressure.
I'll end this entry with a little action-packed video clip of me driving down route 12 in Cape Hatteras. Cape Hatteras kicked ass-eras, the waves were great for surfing , the drive there is really pretty, and the beaches were seldom crowded. My friend asked me if I met any cute surfer boys down there. I said that all the other surfers there were about 13 years old. I got so many phone numbers!

12

2007-06-08T10:06:00.000-07:00

those crazy christians and their paintballing!

I'm still in the state of North Carolina. I can't say why, I'm kind of over it by now. So earlier this week I was in Raleigh, which is part of the "triangle" (local lingo) that also includes Durham and Chapel Hill. I was visiting a NYC expat friend, it was very nice to hang out with someone I know for a change. Lord knows I love strangers, but familiar people are nice every once and a while. While in Raleigh I visited the North Carolina Museum of Art, where I saw a somewhat unimpressive Egyptian exhibit entitled "Tombs and Treaures." I think I'm jaded by the Met's Egyptian collection. Not a bad museum overall though.
My Raleigh friend took me to a meeting of her book group, seeing as she and I used to be in the same (kick-ass) book group in NYC. The unfortunate part about Raleigh book group as opposed to NYC book group is that no one gets shit-faced because everybody has to drive home. And in this case everyone had to drive home to their husbands and young babies, so drugs and alcohol were in major moderation. Just what is book group really supposed to be about anyways? Reading?!?
The next night we hung out in Chapel Hill, where there is a really great Food Co-op called Weaver Street Market. They not only have awesome food (we bought a loaf of olive bread that was not to be believed) but they have all sorts of fun events like dances and Sunday brunches. Happy hippies, cute!
Now I'm camping out for a couple of days in the Outer Banks, and chillin' like a villain on the beach. There are lots of nice campgrounds all over these islands, although the one I went to last night was covered in all these little prickly burrs that got stuck to my skin, clothes, and camping equipment. On the upside it was so windy on the dunes that there were no bugs to bother me at night!
I've hung out in this area before, and every time the raunchiness of the restaurant names here shocks me anew... everything from "Dirty Dick's Crabhouse" (where you can buy a t-shirt that says "I got my crabs from Dirty Dick's" from XXL to kids' sizes) to "Try My Nuts!" which I guess is some sort of place that serves nuts. Come on people, do you really have to resort to such extreme measures to get people to come to your crappy restaurant?

11

2007-06-02T09:09:00.000-07:00

i partied too much in asheville and forgot to take a picture.

Tragedy strikes! No I am not referring to the fact that I left my tub o' peanut butter in a fridge at The Farm. I got my first flat tire, due to a carelessly strewn drywall screw somewhere between Summertown and Knoxville in Tennessee. Was it you throwing screws around? WAS IT?!? No matter, $7.35 later I was on my way with a fresh patch, thanks to the fellas at Donoho's Muffler Shop in Carthage, TN. I made it all the way to North Carolina, where I spent the night atop Pisgah Mountain off the Blue Ridge Parkway. The Great Smoky Mountain range was very pretty, but I was feeling kind of lonely and was anxious to get back to civilization. So after one night I packed it out and headed to Asheville, just a few minutes away.
Asheville: man, for a hippie town there is not a lot of stuff you can do there that's free! I ended up paying a homeless one-armed guy a dollar to show me where free parking was (he led me there on his bicycle, it was mighty nice of him) so not even that was truly free. Later I enjoyed tasty coffee with 50 cent refills (again, not free) and a pleasant atmosphere at the Dripolator Coffeehouse on Biltmore Avenue. Another spot I enjoyed hanging out at that also serves coffee was Malaprops Bookstore on Haywood Street, who are celebrating their 25th anniversary this year. They have a very wide selection for such a small space and their section titles were extremely specific in a very helpful sort of way. "Chick Lit" is not usually my cup of tea but they had a huge section dedicated to it for anyone who's interested. I picked up a copy of The Odyssey to inspire me in my travels. Hopefully I won't have to deal with the whole coming back from the afterlife thing though. If I do I'll be prepared!
After the bookstore I started hanging out with lots of boys who are in bands in Asheville, and the rest of the trip is kind of a blur. They have lots of bands, I couldn't even begin to name them for you. I'm pretty sure I had fun. I drank a lot of PBR and ate guacamole.
One part my stay in Asheville that I do remember vividly is when I got covered in ticks. A new Asheville friend took me for a walk with his doggies (yes I need to be walked and fed too) in this abandoned golf course outside of town. It's been shut down for about 7 years, so the area is lush with growth and there are lots of honeysuckles and whatnot there. Pretty! Now I'm not sure if there is such a thing as a ticks' nest or evil lair or something, but if there is we definitely walked through one because afterwards we looked down and saw that the entire lower halves of our bodies were crawling with ticks. I probably pulled about 60 ticks off of myself right then, and about a dozen more after we got back to his house. It was very, very gross! I think I handled the situation pretty calmly, mostly because I didn't want to embarrass myself in front of my new friend who I didn't know that well, but I was still pretty dang freaked out. Especially because during my stay at The Farm in TN I made a new friend who had just found 6 ticks on her vagina, one of which was so far up that it had to be removed by one of the resident midwives. All I have to stay to that is "yipes."

10

2007-06-02T08:53:00.000-07:00

nature=fun

There are many indulgences I enjoy in life (beer!), and I just added a new one to the list: a good swim in a swimming hole. The Farm, the community I’m staying at in Tennessee, just happens to have one of the nicest swimming holes in the region. And even though I mention the swimming hole first because I’m excited about it, this place has much much more to offer than that. This is one of the original communes, started back in the 60’s with several school buses full of hippies. The school buses are still here today, but they’re just kind of rotting out in the woods and acting as giant trailblazes. The Farm is located on a huge plot of land and they’ve got several businesses that run out of here, including a soy dairy that makes really yummy tofu. I was tempted to stay at the Farm for an extended period of time, and not just for the plentiful beds and showers (not something that I’ve become accustomed to on the road). However I had a Dylan-esque moment in which I had to tell The Farm “I love you baby, but I’ve got to be movin’ on…”

09

2007-05-30T11:31:00.000-07:00

we drank many cans of beer.

Just in case you were wondering: yes, my body is one giant bug bite at this point. This week I feel like I’ve fallen behind on my blogging, but I guess it’s just because so much has happened and I’ve had very limited internet access way out in nature here. Oh where to begin? How about: Eastern Kentucky, what a blast! Who knew? I stayed at Wiley’s Last Resort, a crazy place run by a lovely man on top of Pine Mountain just outside of Whitesburg, KY. I don’t even think I can explain this place in words, you should all just go there and camp there and have a lovely time. Okay maybe you can check out their website first if you must. The proprietor, Jim, always seems to have some sort of party going on there. I was there for a wedding of a friend of a friend. Party moocher, anyone? I have no shame. We had a lovely time and drank many, many cans of beer (Jim prefers cans).
The father of the groom, an exceptionally nice man, is associated with an organization called Appalshop. They do a very good job documenting local history and culture through film, music, and radio. I stayed an extra day after the wedding (moocher) along with some other folks and we got a super special back roads tour of the area from the groom’s father. Whitesburg and the outlying areas are mining towns of the past and present. I learned a lot about coal mining. I learned that I don’t ever want to do it.

not a bad place to sleep!

The next day I drove to Tennessee via the Hal Rogers Parkway, which used to be called the Daniel Boone Parkway, which makes a lot more sense seeing as it takes you through the Daniel Boone National Forest. Just who the Hal does this new Rogers guy think he is anyways? Ha, I crack myself up. I was told that this is a very pretty drive and it was no lie, tree-covered mountains unfold majestically in front of you all along this road. Just cross your fingers that your car doesn’t break down, because there sure as hell isn’t cell phone service in this National Forest.
My first night in Tennessee I stayed at a commune in Whites Creek, just outside of Nashville. I camped out by a pond with the four horsies who live there, despite my fear that the horses might accidentally trample me in my sleep, which they didn’t (Hooray!). I chased fireflies around the pond until it was time for bed. Bedtime was determined as the time when I got scared because lots of bats were flying around. The next morning one of the residents asked me if any “critters” had bothered me out there. When I said no, he proceeded to tell me about all the various kinds of poisonous snakes that live in and around the pond that he had spotted on previous occasions. I am very happy that he didn’t tell me about the snakes beforehand, because otherwise I would have spent the whole night with a flashlight scanning the ground around me. Who am I kidding, I would have spent the night in my car.
On an end note, in the house where I am spending the night tonight (which I will talk about tomorrow) there is a bug flying outside of my window that is so big that I heard it tapping and thought it was a cat trying to get in. Yipes!

08

2007-05-30T11:29:00.000-07:00

Lordy I forgot to tell you about one very cool feature in Red River Gorge! When you enter the park you get to drive through a single lane tunnel that was carved out of a giant stone cliff, the opening is only about 12 feet square. It is really neat-o to drive through a cave, I felt like Indiana Jones.

07

2007-05-28T19:44:00.000-07:00

A kind of scary suspension bridge in Red River Gorge- yeah I walked across it, that's right!

You know what I like about Kentucky? Dudes without their shirts on. Sure not all of them look that good, but a lot of them do and I'm okay with seeing an ugly shirtless guy every once and a while anyways. During my drive from Louisville to Red River Gorge I think I saw more guys without shirts on than I saw clothed. All right all right. Another thing of note about Kentucky is that pretty much the entire state smells like fresh-cut grass, which is pretty dreamy.
All the folks in Louisville highly recommended Red River Gorge (just outside of Lexington) to me as a great hiking spot, which is where I've set up camp for the night. The hiking was pretty good except for the fact that I walked through a spider web about every five feet, but I guess that's nature for ya! A non-nature related nuisance here are the "rowdy boys" (that's according to the nice lady at the visitor center) who are camping about 100 feet from me, who are doing cannonballs into the river on a constant basis. I probably would join them if I was still a teenager, but now I would feel like a creepy old lady if I approached them.
There are many nice back country camping spots right along Red River, and while you do have to pay for a back country permit here it only costs three bucks for one night or five bucks for three nights. So grab four friends and you can come camp here for three days for a dollar. I was 2 cents short when I bought my permit, and the rangers let it slide! They even gave me a penny back, I think they felt bad for me.
xo
m.

06

2007-05-23T09:16:00.000-07:00

West Virginia... go ahead and tread on it!

Greetings from the durrrrrty south! I'm writing from Louisville, KY, which can only be described as a super cute town. The people are so friendly here it makes me kind of nervous. I keep on waiting for them to give me a bible or ask for money or something but really, they're just being nice! A man on the street today did say "God be with you" but that was as close as anyone got to proselytizing. One of the highlights of my stay here so far was brunch at Lynn's Paradise Cafe, a local favorite with really fantastic decor. Their biscuits were out of this world, probably made with a massive amount of lard or something but I was willing to overlook that fact. I was not particularly enthused when I discovered that I was brunching on election day and no one can serve booze before 6pm on that particular day but I got over it. But really, who cares if people vote drunk? At least they're voting!
On my way here I drove through West Virginia and stopped for a hike in the New River Gorge, pictured above. Dang those hill folks and their steep, steep trails, my thighs are killing me! Afterwards I drove past this shopping center that called itself "The Best of West Virginia" so I had to stop by. I bought a "West Virginia: don't tread on me!" t-shirt there, which also came in baby sizes just in case you have a rebellious infant.
xo
m.

05

2007-05-21T06:21:00.002-07:00

pretty but sunburny...

Okay so this will be the quickest blog post in the world because: 1) I've got to get to the state of KY at a reasonable hour and 2) this trip was sort of a sidetrack from my planned route. Intrigued yet?!? Yeah me neither. So this week I was on a trip to Grand Cayman Island in the British West Indies. My parents are recently retired and they're traveling everywhere fun in the world (you see, it's genetic!) and they decided to toss one of my sisters and I a proverbial bone and take us with them on one of their trips. This was my first time ever in the Caribbean, it was nice but frankly too touristy for my taste. I was happy to hit the beach (me + beach = LOVE 4EVA) but there were no waves there and the water was so hot it felt like a giant salty bath. On the upside, I went wakeboarding for the first time which was a blast! It's like snowboarding and surfing in one, me likey!!! Also it's clearly a good workout, because the next day every muscle in my body seized up and refused to function to its usual ass-kicking capacity. Good thing I get to practice a lot this summer with the boys on White Lake, because they wakeboard all the time. Secretly, that's why I wanted to do it while I was in Cayman, so that I could impress them with my mad crazy wakeboarding skills when I visit them next time. And then pretend that I had never done it before, and I was just naturally good at it!
xo
m.

04

2007-05-07T17:29:00.000-07:00

this chicken stole my t-shirt.

Wine, a vegetable garden, and chocolate covered pretzels, who could ask for more? This weekend I stayed with the lovely people of Wycombe Vineyards in Bucks County, PA. If you like good wine (lord knows I do but I'm not picky) made by good people check out their link on the left. I tasted everything they had in their wineshop this weekend and it was all très fantastique. The vineyard is located close to New Hope, PA which is a cute little town where Andy Warhol and other artsy fartsy types used to hang out in the 60's when they were tired of New York. It is now a nice place to walk around where there are no shortages of Indian and Tibetan dress stores, art galleries, and ice cream shops. Highlights of my trip there included:
- the rock star gallery, where you can look at Jerry Garcia's artwork which is surprisingly not crappy! They have other musicians' artwork too.
- A decently-priced vintage clothing store where I bought really awesome purple high heels! The name eludes me right now, it involves the number 13, it's a small town you'll find it.
- The chicken pictured above, which I saw in someone's backyard while we were walking along the canal.
There's also a bridge in New Hope that connects it to Lambertville, NJ, so you can walk right across the state line. I didn't cross it since I'm going to New Jersey in a couple of days anyways but I sure did look at it!
I also helped my gracious hosts plant a vegetable garden this weekend, which was a learning process for me. Who knew planting vegetables was so pleasant and enjoyable? Hopefully something grows there, the zucchini plants looked particularly hearty to me.
After planting my hosts shared with me chocolate covered pretzels that they made, which I'm sure they regretted because I think I ate every single one of them. They grated fresh cinnamon over them fer crissake! What's a girl to do?
Last item of news: did you know that if you take a couple of original-flavored mentos and drop them into a 2 liter bottle of Coke it will create a coke explosion?!? Neither did I until this weekend! I have no idea why it works, but it's really cool and you should try it! Definitely do it outside though, and get ready for an ant invasion afterwards.
xo
m.

03

2007-05-02T09:04:00.000-07:00

back in the lake of whiteness...

Okay so I'm a little behind with the blogging this week because I've been jumping around a bit but here we all are. So I camped and hiked in Shenandoah Valley for a few days, until I got a weird rash on my arm which frightened me so I had to leave. It has since dissipated with the assistance of a proper shower and some hydrocortisone cream. Camping alone for the first time was very very scary but I'm happy that I did it. As I was hiking through the woods during the day, I realized that I don't think I've ever been quite that alone before, with no one around for miles. Crazy! You're never more than 20 feet from another human being in NYC. The loneliness concept made me a little wary, but it was also kind of liberating because I didn't have to think about anything other than what my own body and what it was doing. Sorry to get a little hippie-dippie for a moment, but just let me get an idea across. In my yoga practice I've heard teachers say that you should be thankful for your body and everything that it does, but that idea didn't sink in for me until this week. This week I realized that when it comes down to it your physical body is what propels you through every single thing in your life, so you better damn well make sure you take care of it and treat it right! Eat your vegetables and don't do drugs, and everything will work out fine...

After Shenandoah I stopped by my folk's house in Northern Virginia for a big family party, which of course quickly deteriorated into a drunken bru-ha-ha. We were all dressed very nice. Now I'm back in beauuuuuutiful White Lake NY for a visit with my favorite boys, because I miss them so so much when I'm gone! Oh yeah and I made a pit stop in Brooklyn, because I miss my peeps there too. Did I leave anywhere out? Who cares if I did?

xo
m.

02

2007-04-26T07:15:00.000-07:00

I'll talk about the goat later.

So here I am... camping. I'm starting off in Shenandoah National Park outside Luray, VA because their website is so in-depth (http://www.nps.gov/shen) that it makes camping seem easy even for the nature-impaired such as myself. The trip started off with an unpleasant surprise: the price of a US national parks pass has SKY-rocketed from 50 dollars to 80 dollars this year! The park ranger assured me that this is because it now gives me access to certain hunting and fishing areas which I certainly do not give a shit about. C'est la vie, I'm 80 dollars poor-er but now I can visit as many national parks as I desire in the next 365 days. Due to poor planning on my part, I spent the first night in Shenandoah in the campgrounds because I got there too close to sundown to find a decent place to camp in the backcountry. 17 more dollars down the drain, but at least I've got a toilet for the evening.

As I gathered kindling for the little fire I built that evening I was gripped by a sudden panic and a loud voice in my head said "Run! You don't know anything about camping and you don't even like being by yourself. Go back to New York and get your old life back before it's too late!!!" However ladies and germs, if there's one thing I've learned in life it's that it's always more exciting to take the new difficult path as opposed to the old familiar one. That may or may not be true in this case but I've got to try this shit out for at least one summer, right?!?

OH YEAH the goat... On my way from White Lake to Shenandoah I stayed with my sister in King of Prussia, PA (home of a gigantic mall!). We took my nephews to this park that not only had a petting zoo and a playground, but they had ice cream too! Baby heaven, anyone?
xo
m.

01

2007-04-26T06:48:00.000-07:00

This has nothing to do with anything... but did you know you can buy a flattened dried bunny face at gander mtn, hunting and fishing superstore if you so desire? It's for fly fishing lures. Now I don't know beans about fishing, but why in the hell would a fish want to chomp on a piece of a dead bunny's face? PS I know that gander mtn is a chain, but the folks who work at the one in Montgomery NY in particular are very very rude, especially to young ladies. I'm just sayin' do your camp goods shopping at the wal-mart next door, where you can also buy bill and ted's bogus journey for $5 if you so desire and the employees treat you with a modicum of decency.

upstate shmupstate

2007-04-17T10:59:00.000-07:00

Nature rules OK!
Okay I don't think this is a very exciting week for blogging, but here goes... I'm officially a non-resident of the BROOK to the LYN!!! I dropped my keys in my landlord's mailbox and got the hell out of town on saturday. Moving is so tiring! But now it's over. So let's move on. Now I'm in White Lake NY with my three favorite boys in the world (apologies to anyone else who thought they were my favorite boy, you're still beautiful) and I'm doing REALLY exciting things all week like registering and inspecting my car, getting a PO box, and making spreadsheets and maps of all my routes. Phew the fun never stops when you're upstate! Just kidding, actually it is a blast hanging out up here, it's very pretty and very quiet and there's lots of nice walks and hikes to take through trees and mud and whatnot. And I do mean mud, because of all the shite rainy weather there's very little solid ground to walk on here. Setting chairs on fire is fun fun fun!!!
xo
m.

my life

2007-04-12T11:48:00.000-07:00

getting rid of all your belongings is harder than it looks.

she's nothin but a big old boat

2007-04-12T11:17:00.000-07:00

Common sense tells me that my energy level is waaaaaay too low to write my first post right now, but did common sense ever get anybody anywhere? No way Jose. Here's what's going on in my week friends, I'll make a bulleted list so it's easy to read:

- moving out of Brooklyn after 7 years. 7 YEARS?!? Criminey I've got to get out of here... How long does it take to make a window display anyways? You got me, I'm not an expert or anything.

- Dropping my few earthly belongings off at my "storage space" a.k.a. my parents' basement. I love you mom & dad! But I love your unfinished basement more.

- Going upstate to hang with THE COOLEST BOYS IN THE WORLD. Just kidding, really I'm hanging out with Benji and Jacob and Brain. Do you like pizza? Do you like the Catskills? Check yourself before you wreck your pizza-self and go to the Benji & Jake's link on the left!!! I'm going up there to mary-nate (does that joke work in print?) for a little while before I leave. Hopefully while I'm there there will be a miraculous spring thaw, because it is still way too cold to camp anywhere!

- I'm going to learn how to camp. What the hell do I know about camping?!? I've been living in Brooklyn making window displays, I don't even know anything about being outside! Last time I went outside, I fell in a river (see a re-enactment below, it's in 2 parts)!!! I've been reading lots of books on the subject, but I really don't think that's the same thing. I'll update you on how this goes...

** Here's an interesting fact I learned in one of my camping books: Don't pick up a poisonous snake, even after it's dead, because they can deliver a venomous bite by reflex even after death! Whoa!

I like writing in bullets!

xo
m.